[:: jasleen world ::]

USELESS!


This is the only word i can think of to describe myself. Haiz.
It was a bad day for me. Today i took 1 day leave just to attend an interview as well as a 1 day trial at Little Skool House. I love the area and the school but not what i am doing. I am assigned to take care of infant and i realise that i can't take care for them. They cry 1 by 1. You coax 1 and another 1 start to cry. I am new there so when i wanted to play with them they starting cry cos they don't know who am i. They are not familiar with me.

i learn how to feed 1 of the child cos she is the only 1 who let me feed. Other child when i just sit infront of them to prepare to feed they starting crying already.

All this well i keep telling all my friend that i love kids that why i took up this course. But in the end the love and to take care of them is different. I told the principal that i would like to take care toddler or older children but not infant. That's when is end of the day she interveiw me by starting to ask me how was my day today. And i told her i am tired. She say she understand. So from here i start to tell her i think i will prefer taking care of todder and above. And she told me that i can't go far cos i don't have 'O's. But i told her i am current taking Fundamental cert in Early childhood then continue taking infant & toddler cert followed by diploma. She say, no you can't, the max you can go is infant and toddler already. They will still need 5 'O's no matter what and also at least a B3 in english. Then i was like OMG.
I was told by my classmate about this but i don't believe cos the person that do all my enrol for the school told me i can slowly go up to diploma. But now everyone say cannot.

The main reason is i think i choose the wrong path for myself. Haiz. I don't really like to handle kids. I love them but to take care of them i think i will be dying very fast. And the worst parts is i can only take care of infant.
I hate myself. Seriously Hate.
I cry when i meet my bf today after i end work from the childcare. I just bust out with tears. I am soooo tired. I don't know how to descirbe the tired i have at that moments.
It is more tired then i work in my current office job. Is like 90% more tired then i work in office.
Is not easy. As all my friends told me. Is not easy. Now i understand how hard is that hard.

I guess i will have to stay in this company. Fellow colleague you will be disturb by me Jasleen for sometime again. haha.
After working at the childcare centre for 1 days i think i fall in love with my current office job althoug there is a bitch in the company. Cos i think at least i am familiar with all the things and people there, know how to handle them.
I still want to thanks the childcare centre to give me this experience. It's a great experience and also a expensive one. haha.

Now what i need to face it all the eyes and the comment from friends and family. I really hope everyone can support me. Haiz. I am soo worry now. Wonder what comment will i get from you guys. haiz.